Many happy returns
by Lady Kiddymonster
Summary: In this story set after 3.5 Edith is distraught to realise that Anthony's birthday is approaching. But is it a day he would prefer to forget or can they make it worth celebrating? Republished in honour of Robert Bathurst's birthday (22nd February)
1. Chapter 1

MANY HAPPY RETURNS

**A/N In this story set after 3.5 Edith is distraught to realise that Anthony's birthday is approaching. But is it a day he would prefer to forget or can they make it worth celebrating? Republished in honour of Robert Bathurst's birthday (22****nd**** February)**

Chapter 1

Edith sighed; she was tired as she had found it difficult to sleep since Sybil's death. She missed her sister because she had got on much better with Sybil than she ever had with Mary.

But that was not all that was on her mind; her first thought on waking and her last before sleeping were still of the intense blue eyes of Sir Anthony Strallan, the man she still loved desperately. Edith had forgiven him for breaking her heart long before and was mindful of the fact that her family had done little to help her come to terms with being jilted and Edith was deeply resentful for, even dead, Sybil got more attention than she did. The family culture still revolved around whether or not Mary was happy and Edith missed Anthony so much; he had treated her like a person in her own right. He had engaged her in the intellectually stimulating conversation she craved and he had called her lovely which no man ever had, no men normally looked twice at her.

Edith bitterly rebuked herself for not standing up more for what she had wanted; instead she had allowed Anthony to be swayed by her father and grandmother, Violet the dowager countess of Grantham.

Edith knew that she could have made him happy and she knew he would have made her so. She could not stop loving him and she knew because she had tried so hard to do just that. She would have been happy to help him; she would have been a valet as well as a wife. She would have enjoyed undressing him and she would have been more than happy to share his bed. The trouble was that they had had precious little time alone together before the near wedding; time in which they could really have talked about expectations and how to get around their issues. For Edith his injured arm had never been an issue. He was a dear sweet intelligent and very handsome man but his self esteem was fragile.

Tears trickled down Edith's face; pretty soon her body was shaking with convulsively violent sobbing. She didn't know why she was sobbing because no one ever cared to come to her if they heard and she knew she was in for waking up once more in another lonely grey dawn without him by her side and her face and pillow wet with hot useless tears. She caught herself wondering if he had cried since that day. She knew that she could never love anyone else while Anthony Strallan still drew breath.

Violet was passing when she heard her granddaughter sobbing. Pratt the chauffeur was sick with flu so Violet had agreed to spend the night at Downton rather than get him to rise from his sickbed to return her to the Dower house. She tapped lightly on the door but Edith did not hear the knock above her tears.

.Violet crept quietly into the room and sat on her granddaughter's bed.

"Edith dear, whatever is wrong?" Violet asked gently.

Edith turned to face her grandmother; her face flushed red.

"What do you care?" Edith snapped; Violet drew back shocked by the vehemence of her tone.

"I care about Sybil and what happened to her."

"I'm not crying for Sybil, Granny. She would have hated us crying over her; she would have wanted us and Tom to get on as best we could without her."

"I suspect you are right about that, Edith, Sybil never was one for tears and gloom."

"Please leave Granny; I really don't want to talk to you. I have been left to cry and cope alone with what I'm crying about since it happened; or didn't happen in this case. I just have to live with it and I don't want an audience for my broken heart."

Violet sighed audibly as she often had whenever Strallan's name was spoken or implied.

"You have to do your best Edith dear."

"That is easy for you to say; you who virtually gave him carte blanche to walk out on what should have been the happiest day of my life. None of you ever cared to even ask if I was alright or even how I felt about him; had Mary wanted to marry him then his age and injury would suddenly not have been problems because Mary always gets what she wants and I never do; I'm second best. Even Sybil gets more consideration than me and she's dead," Edith looked at her grandmother," Granny I love Anthony Strallan and I always have; I don't care that he's older than me or even that he's injured. He's paid me more attention than any I ever got here, he cares about what I think and feel and he even noticed what I wore. He made me feel alive and we talked about so many things and shared so many views and interests. You and Papa never wanted that for me but surely you want me to be happy and the only way I would ever be happy would be as his wife. I took care of men during the war who were injured far more seriously. Papa never fought in the war but Anthony did so surely he deserves respect for risking his life not contempt for his injury. Now I will never see him again, never look into those lovely blue eyes of his, never hear his voice and because of that I am dying inside. People say broken hearts heal but even if I never see him again I will still love him until I take my final breath. You and Papa may have successfully stopped me marrying him but you will _**never**_ stop me from loving him. Never, now please leave me alone as I want to cry for the man I love in peace."

Violet did not even try to defend her actions or those of her son, Edith's father, but the words stung like a slap in the face. Edith was right; what consideration had been shown for her feelings. She quietly slipped from the room; hanging her head in shame.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Robert was still up; he sat in the library staring into space as he had often done since Sybil's untimely death. His face was strained; deeply lined with grief and regret.

He was surprised when his mother came into the room; he had thought she had retired to bed a good half an hour since.

"Robert, we need to talk," Violet said, sitting down opposite her son.

"Not now mother," he sighed for he was tired yet too restless to go to bed without disturbing Cora.

"Yes now," she said.

Robert sighed, "Alright, what is so important it can't wait until morning?"

He sighed again, "alright, what is it?"

"I found Edith in her room sobbing her heart out; she gave me short shrift."

"I'll see she apologises tomorrow morning."

"That won't be necessary; everything she said was right."

"Tell me," he demanded.

"We have hurt her, Robert; we stood in the way of what she wanted."

"What was that?" he felt thick headed and dense that evening and blamed Mrs Patmore's heady coq au Vin sauce.

"To marry Sir Anthony Strallan of course. Did you even think to ask her if she was alright after what happened that day? Did you ever ask her how she really felt about the man before we all but persuaded him to shatter her dreams to pieces? "

"No I confess I didn't. I suppose I knew she loved him but was afraid to admit it to myself."

"As was I but the reality is that she really does love him. If may not be what you, what we, wanted for her but I think she would and could have made it work."

"He's too old for her and he is crippled."

"Yes he is but he sustained that injury in the service of King and country which should engender respect, not contempt."

"You're right of course; I did not take up arms against Kaiser Bill so what right have I to criticise a man who did?"

"I was forced to admit to myself between Edith's room and here that I have behaved abysmally; we showed no regard for either Strallan's feelings or Edith's come to that. You have lost one daughter and irretrievably so; do you want to push away Edith too?"

"Of course I don't but I don't see what we can do to make it right. I don't think he would see us and I could not blame him for that either. He won't want to hurt Edith anymore than he thinks he has already,"

"That was our doing Robert; the poor man must have felt like a trapped rat."

"Poor Edith," Robert massaged his temples.

"We have to try; he may agree to see us because he still thinks we agree he did the right thing by her."

"Yes I suppose we owe it to Edith to at least try, I'll talk to her in the morning."

"That would be a start," Violet said.

Sir Anthony Strallan sat up late into the night. His valet had dressed him for bed some two hours since but he was too restless and troubled to sleep.

With his good hand he reached for his wallet and withdrew the small snapshot he had kept close to him in his army uniform breast pocket throughout the war. It was a photograph of Lady Edith. Tears streaked his face but he did not care for this late at night the household was abed and no one would see.

In three days time it would be his fifty-sixth birthday but he had no inclination to celebrate the passing of yet another lonely year. If he had gone through with the wedding, faced down the opposition and truly listened to his heart then she would be at his side. She would have woken up beside him in yet another faceless European hotel room during their honeymoon. She maybe even would have fetched him breakfast in bed after he had made love to her; but she would have been there; helping him to shave and dress. But thanks to the Earl of Grantham and the formidable dowager countess he had done what they wanted and ignored the screaming message in his head and heart. He had seen her dreams fall to the floor shattered into a million tiny pieces.

The words had never been spoken between them; indeed they had not even kissed or held each other but he knew that he loved her and that she loved him. Lady Mary Crawley would just have brushed it off and got on with life but Edith felt more deeply and he felt such guilt for the pain and humiliation he had caused her although he knew that the blame did not rest solely at his door.

He had been so proud of her when he had read her article on women's rights. She was so much more intelligent than either of her sisters and so much more beautiful for it. They had shared so many views and tastes in art, music, literature and politics. He remembered the times they had spent together before the war; the concert in York and the drives they had taken. His life felt so empty and every day was the same; long hours stretching ahead into more. He wished he had stayed and fought for what he wanted for he had wanted to marry her so much and he still did.

But he doubted he would ever be allowed near her again. He was forced to accept this but that did not mean that he had to like it.

"Oh my lovely darling Lady Edith," he whispered as he gazed at the photograph, "can you ever forgive this stupid old fool for letting a treasure like you slip through his fingers?"

He slept with her photograph under his pillow that night and his dreams were of her taking him into her arms, pressing against him and whispering into his ear that she should never have let him go.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Edith did not hurry to breakfast the next morning; she was not hungry and she did not especially want to see her grandmother.

Cora had already eaten for she and Mary had gone shopping in Ripon.

Edith swallowed hard when Violet walked into the dining room.

"I'm sorry about last night Granny for I had no right to say what I did."

"You had every right, Edith," Violet laid her hand on Edith's shoulder and she did not push it away. Violet continued.

"Your father and I totally disregarded yours and Sir Anthony's feelings; I realise now how wrong that was and you have suffered for my interference. You are old enough to make your own decisions; had you been under twenty-one that would have been a different matter entirely. If you truly love him then we will see what can be done to redress the balance."

"I don't think there is anything you _can_ do, Granny, for it is highly unlikely he would agree to see you but thank you anyway."

"Are you going home today, Granny?"

"Well I am not entirely sure because Carson has just informed me that Pratt took a turn for the worst during the night and is now hospitalised with bronchial pneumonia."

"Oh dear; that doesn't sound good but I can drive you back to the Dower house later if you wish."

"I will think about it," Violet smiled, "Do you really love him that much?"

"More than life itself Granny; when I die they will find his name engraved right through me in six inch thick lettering."

Edith smiled sadly, "we would have been alright; I don't care about his injury because when I look at him I see only the man I love. He got injured fighting for our country so that makes him a hero in my eyes. I would happily learn to be a valet as well as a wife. I know I would have managed it and made him happy but it just galls me I was denied the chance to try."

"I have no doubt you would have managed Edith, I admit that I was very wrong and that is not something I do very often as you know. The poor man was put under such pressure but I am prepared to go and apologise to him in person if that is what it takes."

"Thank you Granny but with respect he has probably had enough of this family to last three lifetimes. Please just leave him in peace."

"Don't give up on him, Edith otherwise you will end up accepting second best and I don't want that for you."

Robert came in just then. Carson came to pour his coffee and then left."

"Edith, I owe you and Anthony Strallan a big apology and a lot of humble pie. We completely disregarded both your feelings and never took time to find out what it meant to you. I'm afraid I was almost frightened to admit to myself that you loved him and I still served my own ends. I still think he is too old for you but he was injured in the service of his country whereas I did not take up arms against Kaiser Bill so I have no right to criticise. I have no doubt that you could manage more than adequately but if your grandmother and I can do anything at all to put things right than we will."

"Thank you Papa but, as I said to Granny a short while before you came in, it is highly unlikely he would want to see you; sure he is gracious so would agree but he would not necessarily want to and could you blame him?"

"No, I don't suppose I could."

But for Robert, Earl of Grantham, it wasn't so much the fact he had denied to himself that Edith loved Strallan but he had not wanted to see that his daughter had grown up. He loved Edith and having lost Sybil he felt the loss keenly; he did not want to lose Edith too. He had denied her the happiness she deserved for his own selfish ends and he had seen her publicly humiliated. He wanted to make things right.

Edith left the dining room soon after.

"Well what do we do Robert? Pratt can't take us to Locksley and I am not sure we should ask Tom at this time."

"Edith can drive,"

"That would hardly be appropriate under the circumstances."

Sir Anthony Strallan sat at his writing table; the wastebasket was almost overflowing with aborted attempts to compose a letter to Edith. He had become quite proficient at writing left-handed; his early attempts had been little more than illegible scrawl.

He was tired of wallowing in self-pity; if he had stood up for himself he would not be here now, he would be in Europe with her.

He had thought simply of writing her a short polite note asking her to come to tea on his birthday but he could not get the wording right; he dreaded the fact that the day would be yet another memorial to another lonely year. He patted his breast pocket in which was hidden the photograph of Edith. He should not need a photograph; he should have the real thing. He wanted her so much, wanted to put his good arm around her and draw her close to him. He wanted to see her; no matter how painful it would be for them.

Then his butler came into the room to announce a totally unexpected visit.

"The Earl and dowager countess of Grantham are here to see you Sir.

This was not only unexpected but totally unwanted. He sighed deeply.

"Show them in and get some more tea," he said.

"Very good Sir."

He had failed to stand up for himself at the right time but Sir Anthony Strallan knew that, if there was any right time to stand up for the right to love Lady Edith, then that moment was surely now.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

**A/N: I think Anthony fans will have just cause to be very proud of him by the end of this chapter. Please review and let me know if I'm right.**

The butler showed Robert and Violet into the sitting room and Anthony bade them be seated. Shortly afterwards tea was brought in and poured for them. Anthony felt very uncomfortable, despite being in his own home, for he had no idea what to expect from this visit. He understood that his future happiness, and possibly his own life and sanity, could depend upon it.

"I was extremely sorry to hear about Lady Sybil," he ventured.

"Thank you," Robert bowed his head.

Anthony felt anger rise in him and knew that he must control it. He was a grown man after all, not a petulant schoolboy; although possibly his hurt might well entitle him to react in that way. He had to keep his dignity intact although he realised it was difficult but he reminded himself that he had been injured in the service of his country and Robert had not so what right did he have to criticise him or make out that he was not good enough for his daughter? Edith had thought that he was more than good enough and perhaps hers was the only opinion he should have taken seriously; not those of people like those who sat before him now who had not wanted her to be happy. He suspected Lord Grantham had Edith marked out as the reliable spinster daughter who would take care of him and his wife in their old age. Anthony tried to relax but was angry; if Lady Edith took care of anyone in their old age he wanted it to be him.

He waited; sensing that Robert was absorbing his condolences over Lady Sybil.

Robert spoke first.

"Sir Anthony, I can only apologise for the way in which I have treated you in particular regard to my daughter. We gave your feelings no regard whatsoever and I can only apologise for that. I am thoroughly ashamed of my behaviour. You sustained an injury in the service of your country in a war where I myself did not take up arms. You are owed respect, not contempt and we had no right to interfere."

"No, you did not," Anthony's tone was measured but his good hand was shaking, "Lady Edith and I were adult enough to make our own choices but I let myself be swayed by your opinions and what you wanted. I never asked her how she really felt about the situation or about me but I am fairly confident than she would have married me had I had nothing but the clothes I stood up in. She never cared about my age or this," he indicated his arm in its sling," we would have made it work. You thought I would drag her down so she ended up as little more than a nursemaid but I am not as helpless as all that; I am still a man in the way it counts and I would have looked after her; indulged her and stimulated her intellect which she just does not get at Downton. I was extremely proud when I read her article in the Times because she had a real flair for what she was doing. We had little time alone to discuss the things that mattered. You still pity me but I do not and nor did your daughter. Lady Edith gave me back my life and she gave me hope but you took that from me. You put me under pressure because of your prejudices and left me little choice. Do you really think I wanted to walk away leaving our dreams in tatters on the church floor? Of course I didn't because I will love Lady Edith until my last breath. You forced my hand in that choice, Lord Grantham.

His rage abated slightly as Violet began to speak.

"Sir Anthony, I found Lady Edith sobbing her heart out for love of you last night; something I am sure she has done many times since that day. She told me things that I needed to hear. We had no idea how much pain our interference had caused and I will have to live with that for the rest of my life."

"Are you sure you are not merely contrite because you have irretrievably lost one granddaughter, Lady Grantham, and fear pushing another away? You think talking to me will placate her in thinking you at least tried. Talking to me will not smooth things over because Lady Edith feels deeply and does not forget such hurts. If she is bitter and emotional then it is you and your interference made her that way, not I."

The words stung Violet like a slap across the face. They were losing ground fast but both were quietly impressed by Anthony's dignity. Robert could sense the maelstrom of turbulent emotion raging in the heart of the man Edith loved.

Anthony swallowed.

"It's my birthday on Friday but it will not be marked except as a memorial to another lonely year passed. I could have been spending it with Lady Edith but I shall be alone lamenting the fact that I have lost her. I have not broken her heart; your prejudices and interference have done that for me. If you have come to me to seek forgiveness then you have wasted your time because I cannot easily forgive either of you for costing me my last chance of happiness. I was good enough for her, although I seldom believed her on that score, but any man should be proud for his daughter to marry a man who fought and survived the Great War.

He stood, "Please leave now."

Robert and Violet got to their feet, "if I may say one thing," Violet said.

"Well I know you always prefer to have the last word, Lady Grantham."

"If you called Edith she would come running to you; just think on that and she does not know we are here."

.

.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Anthony was visibly shaken after Robert and Violet had left; he poured himself a whisky although it was not yet midday. He had a need for it as the golden liquid swilled down his throat. He was shaking with a kind of righteous indignation; somehow they had still succeeded in belittling him, making him feel he was still not good enough. But Edith had thought he was and he realised he should have listened to no opinion but hers. She had never belittled him; in fact she had always tried to build his confidence and he felt that she would have been every proud of him. She had always laughed with him, never at him and he felt like he mattered to her. He wanted her in his arms, well the crook of his good arm anyway; he wanted her by his side as his wife, his Lady Strallan, and he wanted her to share his bed.

He was sure she would not find his battle scarred body attractive for long but what did it matter as long as she was his? But he had never had a chance to ask her if she was interested in sharing his bed for gentlemen just did not speak of such things to their fiancées. In his dreams, when he made love to her, he had two good arms and was a sensational lover but he sensed that the reality would probably be far different.

He could not really work out what the earl and the dowager countess had hoped to gain by their visit and it worried him that they appeared to have done it behind Edith's back. If they had come for forgiveness then they had left empty-handed. Sir Anthony Strallan did not have a malicious bone in his body but he felt it would do them no harm to suffer for want of forgiveness in the way they had made him and Lady Edith suffer for want of each other.

He sat down and tried to write again but suddenly he was aware of his hand and the pen skimming across the page. He signed it and re-read it over to check. Being satisfied he placed it in an envelope and addressed it in his clear hand.

Anthony paid a messenger boy to take the letter to Downton Abbey and place it in Lady Edith's hands alone.

Edith was taking a walk when the messenger boy approached on his rickety old bicycle.

"Are you Lady Edith Crawley," he panted.

"Yes."

"I have been instructed to deliver this into your hands and yours alone," he handed her the envelope. Edith turned it over in her hands and almost dropped it in a muddy puddle when she recognised the handwriting. She knew it from the letter her father had instructed him to write.

"Please tell Sir Anthony Strallan he will have an answer one way or another very soon."

"Very good, My Lady," he picked up his bicycle and rode off.

Edith slipped the letter into her pocket.

She hurried back to her room where she closed the door and sat down on her bed. She took out the envelope and kissed it. She slit it open and drew out the contents; her breath caught in her throat.

_Dear Lady Edith_

_I had a visit from your father and grandmother this morning; I am pretty sure it was without your knowledge. I don't know what their true purpose was but if they were seeking forgiveness they left empty-handed._

_I was very sorry to hear about Lady Sybil but I hope that you are alright; you are the only person at Downton I care for._

_I would really like to see you, Lady Edith, but I know w that it will be painful for both of us so if you decline I will understand. It is my birthday on Friday and I dread spending it alone letting another lonely year pass me by. If I had had the strength to stand up for what was right then we would have been in Europe now but I was fool enough to let a treasure like you slip from my one handed grasp. I could write reams about what could and should have been but I would rather spend some time with you and tell you in person. I will say that I am deeply sorry for any hurt caused. I know I humiliated you and I would understand if you never wanted to see them again but your family's indifference broke both our hearts_

_Please do not confront your father or Lady Grantham about their visit although if they mention it to you please show your displeasure. I think you might have been proud of me because I really stood up for myself today; in the way I should have done all those months ago._

_Lady Edith, I love you and if you would give me a second chance I would be there for you in a heartbeat. I know I am good enough for you because you told me so and yours is the only opinion of which I should have taken any notice; I cannot write as eloquently as you; I was very proud of you when I read your piece in the Times._

_I hope to hear from you although maybe I have no right to expect such courtesy._

_PLEASE __forgive this silly old fool who loves you and who listened to the opinions of everyone but the person who mattered. I know you would have married me had I had nothing but the clothes I stood up in and that means everything._

_Yours in nothing but hope_

_Sir Anthony Strallan_

Tears flowed down Edith's face but happy ones this time; the man she loved had told her he loved her in turn and would come back to her in a heartbeat. She decided that she would spend his birthday with him and they could go for a walk or a drive and talk about everything that they felt and everything that mattered. She decided she would ask Mrs Patmore to make him a cake to take with her but she did not want the cook to get into trouble so she would have to make sure Carson was there when she asked the favour so he would not think Mrs Patmore was doing it to assist the likes of Ethel Parks. She did not have to tell him who the cake was for after all; it was none of Carson's business.

It was Tuesday so she had almost two whole days before the birthday itself.

The following day she drove into York and picked out a new dress in emerald green chiffon; Anthony liked her in green. She scoured the shops for a suitable gift for him; in the end she picked out a small slim volume entitled _"Words to build your confidence and impress your friends."_ It was anonymous but leafing through it told her that he would appreciate the contents.

Tom had driven Violet back to the Dower house but news from the hospital was that Pratt was now over the worst and expected to make a good recovery. Bates was also expected to be released from prison in a week's time and Anna was on cloud nine because of it.

Edith made her request to Mrs Patmore in front of Carson; stating that it was no subterfuge or attempt to help Ethel Parks but a present for a dear friend whose name she refrained from mentioning. Mrs Patmore said she would have it ready for Edith if she came down after breakfast on Friday morning and she would put it in a box.

The rest of the week seemed interminably long for both Edith and Anthony but longer for Anthony as he had no way of knowing if she would respond, other than in trusting he verbal message she had given the delivery boy, but he found that he was beginning to hope in a way he had not hoped for a long time.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

Edith could barely contain her excitement at dinner on Thursday.

Mary and Matthew were absent as they had gone to Whitby for a long weekend. Mary had been reading _Dracula _and had expressed a wish to see the coastal town where the ship bearing the vampire count's inert corpse had come ashore and Matthew had quickly taken her up on it saying she needed a break after the tragedy of Sybil's death. Cora was in the study as she was expecting a telephone call from her mother, Martha Levinson, in New York.

"You seem much brighter today, Edith," Violet said.

Edith grinned broadly, "Yes Sir Anthony has written inviting me to spend his birthday with him and I fully intend to go." She did not tell Violet about the main contents of the letter for it was none of her business and she had decided to honour Anthony's request and not let on that she knew about the visit.

"If he proposes then accept him, "Robert said, "I never disliked the man, I want you to know that, but he is more than good enough if he can make you happy and you can do the same for him."

"Oh I fully intend to because I fully intend to be Lady Strallan in every possible sense."

"Just talk about everything that matters and a lot of what doesn't." Violet said.

Edith could not sleep that night; she read and re-read his letter and slept with it under her pillow. Her dreams were so lurid and unladylike that she awoke flushed scarlet.

The following morning she had a bath and Anna brushed her coppery hair until it shone. Edith wore her new green dress.

After breakfast she descended to the kitchen and Mrs Patmore showed her a beautiful round cake. Edith could have kissed her. Alfred carried the cake out to the car.

"I hope your friend has a nice birthday, Lady Edith," Alfred said shyly.

"I know he will," Edith said, "thank you."

She drove to Locksley as fast as she dared. She was so excited at seeing him again.

Sir Anthony had also taken a bath that morning and donned one of his best suits. He had high hopes of seeing his lovely Lady Edith.

He had just sent for coffee when the butler came in again.

"Lady Edith Crawley is here to see you, Sir."

"Splendid; please bring a second cup."

She walked into the room and set the cake box down on the table. He walked over and she lifted the lid.

He was very touched by it.

"It's down to Mrs Patmore not me. I don't know how to cook."

"I hope she went easy on the salt," he laughed.

Anthony's breath caught in his throat; she looked radiantly beautiful and he felt weak. He had missed her so much that every day without her had seemed as long as a week and he had been in hell.

"You look absolutely lovely in that dress, Lady Edith," he breathed.

"Thank you; looks like you scrub up pretty good yourself."

Edith felt weak as she looked into his blue eyes; God how she had missed those searching eyes and his genially honest and handsome face.

The butler brought in the coffee and poured for them both before departing noiselessly.

She put her arms around him and kissed him gently on the lips.

"Happy birthday my love," she whispered.

"It can't be anything but happy with you here, Lady Edith."

She placed her gift into his hand and he unwrapped it.

"Thank you," he whispered.

He opened the book and saw that she had written on the flyleaf.

"_Darling Anthony; I hope this will be of some help to you. Love Edith. September 1920 xx"_

"I did not know if you would come," he whispered," I could only hope."

"I couldn't _not_ come," she replied softly, "not after I read your heartfelt letter and of your love for me."

"I have been a stupid fool, Edith," he held her hand, "I should have listened to you and not them, I am so very sorry," there were tears in those blue eyes of his. Edith gently stroked his cheek with her warm fingertips drying his tears away. Her touch was gentle and sensual.

"I love you, Sir Anthony Strallan," she murmured, "I always have loved you and I will never stop loving you either."

"I love you too, Lady Edith Crawley," he looked into her eyes, "I was arrogant enough to think I knew better and fool enough to think I could live without you at my side but I have been through absolute hell. I could not bear to lose you again."

"I have been through hell too; Sybil's death was the last straw."

"Your grandmother told me you were sobbing your heart out; I never meant to humiliate you like that."

He wept in her arms and she soothed him, holding him tightly.

"We have both been punished enough already for loving each other, my darling; now we have to move on together and never let them separate us again."

He took a sip of his coffee, "I'll definitely drink to that, Lady Edith."

She clinked her cup against his, "So will I."

"I've always thought you were beautiful in body as well as in soul and spirit," he flirted, "but I can honestly say I have never known you seem so alive with love as you do at this moment."

Edith was choked with emotion; what he had just said had been beautiful and even more so for being true.

"I wondered if we could go for a drive after lunch," he said, "speed along the roads like we used to."

"I would like that so very much," she breathed, her eyes shone brightly.

She slipped her right arm under his injured one. He took off his sling to make it easier for her. She held him close and closed her eyes as she breathed in his masculine scent. She enjoyed having him so close to her; it was something she had wanted for a very long time.

"There were times after the war when I felt so low that I wanted to put my service revolver to my head although I wasn't confident I could do it left-handed. But I kept a photo of you in my pocket and thoughts of you brought me through because I could not bear to think how disappointed you would be with me. I don't expect to ever be able to use my arm again but that doesn't matter anymore because I am still a man in the way that counts and you would have married me had I had nothing but the clothes I stood up in."

"I would have done, my darling; you are all the man I could ever need or want."

For an answer he kissed her passionately, his mouth caressing hers and exploring her throat and jaw line, moving up to her ear and back again. Edith threw herself into the kiss which quite literally took their breath away.

"Oh my lovely, how could I have been as weak as to allow your family to separate us so cruelly?"

"I forgave you that day my beloved; I knew that it was not your fault. You must have been so overwhelmed by it all. We must look only forward now."

They had lunch together; totally relaxed with each other.

That afternoon they went for a drive and pretty soon they were speeding along the lanes with the wind tousling their hair. They laughed and joked and he was touched that every so often she would reach out and caress his injured right arm. He seemed so happy.

They stopped by a pretty little stream; Edith had brought a blanket, a flask of lemonade and two cups. She poured some for them both and they drank peacefully. They did not speak for they were totally comfortable without the need for words.

He dropped to one knee and took her hand in his.

"Lady Edith Crawley, would you grant me the privilege of agreeing to become my Lady Strallan?"

"Yes, oh a million times yes my darling Anthony," tears flowed down her cheeks. He held her and kissed the tears away with his warm lips.

"You have just given me a birthday gift that surpasses any material possession. You will be my social and intellectual equal and you will never want for company or intellectual discourse again. "

"That sounds ideal my darling and, in case you ever wondered, I intend being Lady Strallan in every sense."

"I never dared to hope that you would want me in that way," he breathed.

Edith flushed.

"Anthony Strallan, you are absolutely the most gorgeous man I have ever set eyes on; how could you ever think I would not wish to share your bed? I will be a valet as well as a wife. You are a war hero and no woman could have a greater honour than sharing your bed. I want you to be my first and only lover,"

"I'm a bit out of practise there, Lady Edith, but rest assured I know that it works alright if you know what I mean."

Edith blushed for she knew exactly what he meant.

She kissed him with a passion that took his breath away; her mouth explored his as well as his throat and jaw. When the kiss broke, they were both trembling violently.

"Lady Edith," he gasped, "how I wish I could make you mine right now; I can feel how much you want me."

"I have wanted you for longer than maybe even I realised, my darling."

They drove back to Locksley and spent their time drinking tea and talking about everything and nothing.

They dined together that evening; the ambience was soft with lighted candles and soft music. Edith held his hand across the table and looked into his eyes; she smiled as she saw his love for her reflected there.

"This has been the best birthday ever," he murmured.

"That is good because it is no less than you deserve."

She found it very difficult to leave him that evening but knew that it was not a final parting but the first of many; until she became Lady Strallan and then she would never need to leave his side again.

He walked out with her to the car and held her close for a moment.

"Goodnight my darling," he said, tears in his eyes.

"Goodnight, my handsome lovely baronet."

She drove away and waved to him.

Anthony walked back inside and poured himself a whisky.

It really had been the most perfect day; a thousand times better than he had ever dared to hope and all because of just one woman.


	7. Chapter 7 Epilogue

Epilogue

Anthony was invited to dinner at Downton Abbey several times over the next few months. He had made good use of the book Edith had given him and no longer lacked confidence. Even Mary had to admit that she had misjudged him as he seemed able to engage her in conversation on things that interested her and she had quietly apologised to him for what she had said in spite at the garden party but he had said it didn't matter anymore. He also consoled Tom who listened because he understood Anthony knew what it was like to be a widower.

Anthony went on a short trip to France to meet up with some old army pals. While he was away Edith approached John Bates; Lord Grantham's valet.

"I need some advice Mr Bates," Edith flushed, "you see I want to have some tips on undressing men without getting practical experience. I don't want to appear awkward on my wedding night but because of my fiancé's injury I will need to be a valet as well as a wife and if I asked Thomas for help it would be all over the servant's hall in moments."

"I don't doubt it, Lady Edith."

He gave her some advice; even going so far as to find an old mannequin in the attics which he dressed in men's clothes and gave Edith tips on how to remove the most awkward items of men's clothing.

"I should think you will be fine, Lady Edith."

"Thank you, Mr Bates and I am glad that you finally got the justice due to you."

"I knew it would happen but I did despair at times."

Lady Edith Crawley became Lady Edith Strallan on New Year's Day 1921. It was a small quiet affair with just family and servants from Locksley and Downton which was just what they had both wanted.

They left the wedding breakfast and drove home to Locksley.

He lifted her bodily with his strong left arm and lifted her over the threshold.

"Welcome home my lovely Lady Strallan," he whispered to her, "My god I love you so much."

"I love you too, my gorgeous hero and dashingly handsome husband."

Their wedding night was an event which far surpassed Anthony's expectations. She had confessed about the lessons Bates had given her on the mannequin so she was more prepared.

She undressed him expertly, pausing every so often to caress and kiss him, tracing his scars with her fingers and lips. He was so handsome and despite his protestations she found him increasingly more attractive.

She went to remove her wedding dress but he stopped her with a passionate kiss.

"Let me help you, my lady; with you by my side I truly believe I can do anything."

His breath caught in his throat as he removed her wedding dress one handed and it dropped to the floor. Her naked beauty touched him and he drew her close with his one good arm. She pressed against his body, suddenly acutely aware of his need and her own hunger for him.

"You are beautiful through and through," he gasped.

Hours later they lay together, her head resting on his broad chest. They were drenched in sweat and she sighed deeply. He had introduced her to exquisite sensual pleasure which she had never dared imagine and she had pleasured him too; her entire mind focused on his pleasure. He drew her close.

"I really feel married now," she murmured, "That was so beautiful."

"It was, you really have given me my life back and I never knew it was possible to be so happy."

They gave the British winter a miss and honeymooned in Europe visiting historical cities; he seemed so relaxed and happy and, more importantly, confident. He truly believed in his own abilities and that he had something to offer the world. In truth he barely noticed the uselessness of his right arm now.

When they returned to England in early April, Dr Clarkson confirmed that Edith was nearly four months pregnant with Anthony's child.

In September Edith was closeted in her room with Dr Clarkson and Isobel Crawley in attendance as she went through labour. Robert had come to keep Anthony company as he paced the floor.

"It will be alright, Anthony," Robert said, "My daughter is physically strong."

"I forgive you and the dowager countess for your interference, Lord Grantham. I have never been as happy as I am now. "

Robert was about to say something when a loud cry rent the air and moments later Isobel Crawley appeared.

"Congratulations, Sir Anthony; you have a son. He and Edith are doing very well."

"Thank god," Anthony gasped.

He hastened into the room where the baby was suckling at his mother's breast. Anthony blinked tears from his eyes.

"Anthony my darling, come and meet your son."

He managed to take the baby in his left arm and cooed at him.

Anthony's son, Anthony Robert Strallan, was followed eighteen months later by a daughter in the image of her mother. They named her Sybil Violet Elizabeth Strallan.

Anthony Strallan and his wife relaxed with a drink; the children were in bed and she lay back against him.

"I really do love you, Lady Edith Strallan," he murmured, "You truly have made me the happiest man in Yorkshire."

"I love you, Sir Anthony Strallan, and I can better that because you have made me the happiest woman in the whole world."

"You always have to go one better, "he teased.

She kissed him passionately and pressed against him, suddenly aware of their needs.

"Do you fancy an early night?" she murmured in his ear.

"Now that is something I would be more than happy to oblige."

She got up and took his hand, pulling him to his feet. She flirted constantly as she led him upstairs to their bedroom.

It really could not get better than that, he thought. He had never thought he deserved to be so content but her gentle touch, her hands insistently unbuttoning his shirt and her lips caressing his mouth and throat confirmed otherwise. He was everything Lady Edith wanted and she was everything he wanted too.


End file.
